Where I Was on April 19, 1995

Wow...look how tricky I am, I actually took the time to put the "button" on my post today. Something I don't normally do, but today I'm not rushed to get something posted.

So, today the RHOK asked, "Where Were You on April 19, 1995." I think I can offer a different perspective on this question than most people who post a McLinky today. Because I was not living in Oklahoma. I watched this unfold from the "outside."

I was living in Manhattan, Kansas (I moved to Oklahoma two months later--maybe I'll post about why I decided to move later). I remember hearing about it as I arrived at my job as supervisor of one of the bookstores at K-State (I was kind of at a place in my life where I was double thinking my decision about what I'd majored in and was working just to pay the bills and stay in Manhattan until I figured out where I wanted to move to). After I arrived at the bookstore, I always went to the breakroom/kitchen area to get my morning Diet Coke and see what they day would bring. It was there that someone told me what happened in Oklahoma City--that a building in downtown had exploded. It certainly piqued my interest because I had family living in Oklahoma, but I knew they were safe...they were in Tulsa and Stillwater and wouldn't have ventured over to downtown Oklahoma City by 9:00 a.m. So while I found it a little too close to family, I didn't glue myself to the TV to see what was going on. I don't think I saw images of the building until I got home that afternoon. People mentioned it throughout the day, but keep in mind, it was 300 miles away, it wasn't really the main topic of conversation...

until....

Timothy McVeigh was stopped....

And there was a connection to Kansas....

To Junction City, Kansas...20 miles away.

That's when things got a little dicey. Were we safe? Was he (and his co-horts) headed to Kansas to do the same thing to us? Who knew. But it was most definitely a nervous time for those of us in Kansas. Our hearts were breaking for our neighbors to the south, but felt like we were next on "the list." Plus, I think every fertilizer broker/store in Kansas was put on the defensive and felt responsible (there are many places in Kansas where you can buy large quantities of fertilizer--at least back then, I think that's changed after the OKC bombing. The farmers need that fertilizer...remember the western 2/3 of the state are farmland. If you want to eat bread, the farmers need the fertilizer to feed their field, to grow the wheat, etc., etc.). In a way, I think Kansans in general were put on the defensive, because the thinking was "a Kansan did this to Oklahoma." When in reality Timothy McVeigh wasn't from Kansas, he'd just been stationed at Fort Riley (in Junction City). No way would a real, true, kind hearted, heartlander from Kansas do that (did you ever see any of the interviews with the owners of the fertilizer store where McVeigh got his materials? So sad, this poor guy had such guilt and felt so responsible, but is wasn't his fault. He didn't know he was being lied to).

Anyway, it was a strange, surreal time. Then, when the feds made a connection with McVeigh and Terry Nichols to Kingman, ARIZONA, that made things even worse for people from Kingman, KANSAS. It just got geographically confusing, people didn't listen carefully to news reports and residents of Kingman, KANSAS were defending themselves that they had nothing to do with it and no, we didn't know McVeigh or Nichols. Pretty sure neither of them ever set foot in Kingman, KANSAS.

Anyway, so that's just a jumbled up version of where I was and what happened with me on the day of the bombing and the day/weeks following. It is a most heartbreaking event in Oklahoma's history. Even today when I see the images of that day, I find myself holding my breath, hoping that what I'm seeing isn't real. When I hear stories from people who lost loved ones, I cry. When I hear accounts from the rescuers, my heart hurts. But I will never fully relate like those who lived it as it was happening. I know this will tick people off, but I've never even been to the bombing memorial (actually, I've only really driven through OKC). I'd like to go, but I'm not ready to try to explain the kind of hatred that caused something like that to my kiddos. So maybe we'll just wait a couple years.

When I see the photos of the OKC bombing (and the 9/11 ones, too), it just makes me thankful that I live in a country where I don't live every waking moment with the fear that my car might blow up or that a bomb might destroy and kill hundreds of lives every day. Can you imagine living in that fear every day?

So, in closing, all I can say is God Bless Oklahoma, grant the loved ones of the people who died peace and understand that only God can provide. And I pray that this kind of heinous act never happens again and another life is not lost to that kind of hatred.

Where I'm From

Ok, this is going to be super fast because I have about 5 million things to do in the next hour before I have to be at Katie's school to lead her little Daisy Troop's April meeting. But I told Baloney that I'd do a post on "Where I'm From", so here ya go, quick and fast...

The red square is Kingman County, Kingman in smack in the middle

I grew up in a small town in southcentral Kansas called Kingman. Population...roughly around 4,000, give or take a few. There we about 100 kids in my high school graduation class. Wichita is about 45 minutes away, so we had easy access to things you could only get in a larger city.

Growing up in a small town was good...and bad. Some other time I'll go into the pros and cons of small town living. I had close friends, a wonderful loving family. I was raised with good, Christian moral values that I am instilling in my children. Growing up in a small town gives you a respect for people and human relationships that I think are often missed by growing up in a big city.

This is the Kingman County Museum--it was the original town fire station and city offices.

My hometown was cold in the winter and hot in the summer. I remember 5'+ snow drifts and I remember the bank thermometer reading 121 degrees (therefore there is nothing Oklahoma weather can throw at me that I don't know how to handle). Tornadoes? Yes, of course...it's Kansas...you know...Wizard of Oz. The main street and many of the side streets of Kingman are still red brick streets. A small down town has an old-timey theater with a marquee and a ticket booth. The courthouse take up one city block and is something out of a movie.

Here's the Kingman County Courthouse--isn't it quaint.

When I lived in Kingman I wanted to "move on" and get onto bigger things. But now I find many days where I long for the quietness of a small town and the slow pace. A place where how big of a house you have, what designer clothes you're wearing or the kind of car you drive really doesn't matter. What matters is a kind soul, gentle spirit and loving heart. Things that I believe are the most important.

Gotta go...little Daisies are waiting!

Housewife....Puhleeeze

So I promised Baloney and Dawn that I would do a post on what my definition of a "Housewife" is for the new RHOK webpage. I told them not to hate me if I posted something they didn't agree with. They both told me that they love a renegade (which is me), so here we go....

I don't have to put a lot of thought and multi-paragraphs to explain my definition of a "housewife," to me it is very simple. Here it is: A housewife doesn't exist, that is an antiquated word that is no longer relevant in our society. It would be like calling our troops in Afghanistan and Iraq "Spartans." It's just not relevant in our society anymore. It was a term that pretty much came into popularity in the early 1900's and gained momentum through the late 1940s /1950s/early 60s. But we are no longer "those" women.

"Let's go defeat the Taliban!"

I do appreciate what "those" women gave us...washing machines, dishwashers, FABULOUS fashions--I do love me some 1950's fashions--so tailored, sophisticated, feminine (oh, on another note, remember several months ago when there was that quiz going around on Facebook "What Decade Woman Are You?", well, my answer was 1950s. I was the only one of my friends that took it that got that answer, so I appreciate the 1950s, it's just the majority of the roles women played just aren't existent anymore). But they sure looked beautiful. Ahhh--the days of Dior and Chanel. LOVE IT!

So pretty and feminine--classy. I'd totally wear this.

Tailored, classic, smart. I would wear this any day.

Oh, Ms. Hepburn...be still my heart. Could 50's glamour be more fabulous? Give me the occasion, this is exactly what I'd wear.

Ok...a fashion post is for another day. But I love 50's fashion and just all excited and can't stop talking about it. On with our discussion.

Anyway, the long and short of my definition of a "housewife" is nothing...nada. No such thing anymore. Come on ladies, let's define what we are, without the ridiculous terms thrown around these days...domestic engineer? Gag...NO! Stay-at-home mom/wife? Yeah, right...how many of YOU "stay at home" the majority of your day? Working mom/wife? Um...do we really want to put working women in box that defines them as women who only care about their career and not their life outside the office/workplace? I think not. I don't think there is a word/term out there that can encompass all that women are today, but "housewife" isn't it, nor any of those others just mentioned.

So there you have it.

Except this...

This would be a 1950's fashion I am NOT a fan of, however. Yiyiyi--ouch!

Oh--and Baloney is a punk (she knows what that's about--wink, wink). ;)